Down The Rabbit Hole

Have you ever had a task that required a to-do list? One that had steps in which you take one then another in an ordered fashion? Where number one had to be done before number two and without this order of events, nothing would come together just right?

Planning a wedding requires a certain sense of organization and order. You have to start from the big details then work your way down to the finer points. You start with some colors and a theme, get a general idea of what you want and what you see, then you start searching out locations and venues that fulfill all that you envisioned for your big day.

It’s a pyramid but tipped up on its end, starting with the big picture and working its way down to the details till you reach the finest point at the bottom wherein you have created a precise replica of what you saw in your mind.

Most people of a certain age have been to weddings and have seen that exact pinpoint of details all meshed together to create a cohesive event. The flowers and colors and centerpieces all flow together and create an overall feeling of togetherness. What they don’t see is the  trail of paperwork and planning that goes into the overall feel of a Big Day.

They haven’t fallen down the rabbit hole. This downward spiraling dark tunnel that banks left then right, twisting and turning till you are head down, facing backwards and your pockets are empty of all your money.

Yes…planning a wedding is like tumbling through a long tunnel with no end in sight. You pick your venue, then comes the list of preferred vendors from which you pick other things like a caterer, florist, musicians and a host of other people you never knew existed till it came time to say I Do.

And each vendor has a list of packages and requirements, each of them vastly different from the next. Some require very little while others have a laundry list of dos and don’ts. It’s mind boggling how much shit must be picked through, decided on, and organized just to throw a wedding.

As we make a one decision, 3 more must then be considered. After that, you feel accomplished! I did it! I made a decision on the color of the napkins! But wait! Do you want personalized? Monogrammed? Paper or linen? Will they match the tablecloth? Or the overlay? Wait…what the hell is an overlay!?

The details send us spiraling further downward, casting us up against rock after rock, in between numerous hard spots and tight spaces. Must hit this deadline! Oh look, a sharp corner! Don’t toe that line or you’ll miss an opportunity.

The only thing I hold out for as I tumble through this dark labyrinth of decision and choices is that there will be a light at the end of the tunnel. That light will be the smile as I walk down the aisle towards my best friend. Not many people get to be so lucky.

Not everyone gets to marry their best friend from the second grade.



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