The Small Things

I’m tired.

Last night we spent over an hour tasting food, talking about linen colors and discussing where tables and chairs would go to accommodate our family and friends at our wedding in three months.

Small things. Insignificant things in the overall scheme of life. And then it hit me. A lot of my exhaustion isn’t from lack of sleep (though that’s a problem, too) but from the fact that I realized I’m making decisions about what kind of chicken to serve for a single day when there are bigger and more important things going on in life.

It’s funny what we humans perceive as important. The perfect outfit, having the best and most up to date car. People will argue over the color blue and whether it’s the right blue and not more teal. Goodness…And yet there is so much more to life.

Running parallel to our wedding day choices we’re wading through right now, a new pope was chosen. A decision was made, a vote cast and a new pontiff was picked. Why is this important? Well to me it’s not. It’s very insignificant. I’m a recovering Catholic as of 14 years this past November so my limited memories and the connection to other still-active Catholics has this bit of news at the forefront. But this choice, this big event is so important to so many members of my family and to friends. This will be the new head of one of the largest organized religions in the world.

And to me it’s just another news story on my home page.

Choices. We make them everyday. Some are big, some are small. But to the one making that choice, it is important whether others agree or not.

Choosing which chicken to serve at my wedding is only important because I have to do it. It’s on my list of to-do for this moment in time. Overall, it’s of very little significance and people probably won’t remember whether they had the basil tomato chicken or the chicken marsala. Same with the new pope. It’s a big decision to all those following this faith now but years along the road, another will be chosen and the cycle starts over. That moment will pass.

For us, there are bigger things to consider. Like will we be able to have a baby, something we both want very much. Or how to handle the phase my son is in now so that he grows out of it in a positive way rather than creating a lasting emotional scar. These are important things to us, not flowers or a new pope. Chicken or beef? Blue or teal? Not so much.

My family, my life, those are the things that matter the most to me. Those are the things where my choices matter the most, the little things that make my world brighter and bigger.

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